It bears repeating: Our Artists Do Not Belong To Us; Supporting and Respecting Our Creatives in the Age of Social Media (maybe)

It bears repeating: Our Artists Do Not Belong To Us; Supporting and Respecting  Our Creatives in the Age of Social Media (Hari Kondabolu posted some Tweets and I had a response...so I put it here)

Those that are in the public eye (in whatever degree) do not exist for your entertainment. 

The industry of entertainment is an illusion that propagates fantasy and if you feel frustrated with an artist's so-called failure to live up to that social contract you're ignoring the humanity of that artist. 

You are making them an object responsible for your escape. Whenever you make another human being responsible for anything, they will inevitably disappoint you. 

So stop. Stop making them responsible for that. Let them disappoint you for something real- like a sexual harassment accusation. Because let's be real, when it comes to a bad haircut v. sexual harassment in the office as a choice of things to dislike about a person I'm gonna go with sexual harassment.

Artists (and all public figures) are multifaceted human beings and we get to see parts of them through social media  (and more traditional media outlets). 

However, we are NOT ENTITLED to any part of what they choose to show us. The current state of social media produces a saturation of images that requires individuals who are in the public eye to have to utilize social media to cultivate/sustain their audience. And the larger their image gets, the less control they have over this curation, and the more salacious the stories become. Truth or fiction, the spread of rapid fire gossip is toxic (see the image in my last post). If at any point they choose to stop sharing, that is for them- not for us, and as an act of love we need to support that decision. 

Also, because you have a social media account that is linked to their social media account, OR you have an OPINION about something that they have produced that in some way has disappointed you; IT DOES NOT GIVE YOU LICENSE TO EXERCISE ANY SENSE OF ENTITLEMENT YOU MIGHT HAVE ABOUT ACCESSING TO THEM. 

Our artists do not owe us anything when it comes to our entertainment. 

There are times when their art will go on journeys that are departures from where we are at and this is not a betrayal- it is simply a moment for us to to tell someone we love good bye and wish them well on their new journey and thank them for all the joy we've shared together. 

Now, let me be clear that when an artist is being a shitty human being (Chris Brown & R. Kelly being misognynoirists, or artists using their art to promote hate or worse recreating scenes from Abu Grab in their artistic aesthetic) we can express our disgust through powerful actions like boycott and discussion. I would suggest that when expressing our displeasure that we be sure to link our disgust to our personal beliefs and/or larger social issues. This requires us being prepared to do so in an honest way. Ya know, face your shit and own it.

And this is true even in our small, less public lives. People do not belong to us. We try so hard to hold on to people who do not want to be in our lives, and people try so hard to hold to us when we do not want to be there anymore. 

I speak of course, from a very white perspective which affords me the privilege of being able to move in the world in a way that is much more fluid than that which I have observed for PoC. The entitlement that anyone feels to another person because of social media is not just limited to artists and it's now to the point where it's a personal affront if you don't wish to make yourself seen or shared online as well as offline, or the rapid degradation from subject to object in the digital space. It begs the questions: Why does my agency not matter? Why do you think you can treat me like an object in a digital space? Asking for nudes by the fifth text? Fucking fuck off. 

But I digress.

The point is--with social media giving us so much access to our artists, and each other, it is easy to strip each other of our humanity. As in the offline world, we are not entitled to one another in the online world. And this can have emotionally (and--at worst--physically) violent consequences. 

Our artists are not our minstrels. 

If they produce something that does not speak to us and that does not promote hate, that's okay- there is always next time. We do not need to engage in an accountability conversation with them. 

The Love we have with our artists is a special kind of love. We only get to love a part of them. And this Love should come without conditions.

Support should come with very few conditions. 

Artists are working so hard.

They create and offer their gifts, each time hoping that it will accepted. It is one of the most humbling professions because each offering has the anxiety of "how am I going to match/top this next time?" blaring in the background. And the need to produce can quickly become less about what is authentic to them and more about what they are trying to do for us. 

Fucking let them be. 

Let them give us their gifts.

Support them by going to their shows (take your friends), buying their shit (give it as gifts to your friends), promoting their works (on your social media pages and in your cubicle at work if you have one), reposting their stuff and saying kind words to and about them.
If you do critique- do so thoughtfully. State the issue, link it to a larger social issue and offer a solution that advances the conservation forward.
Don't be a dick.
Don't take it personally if they don't respond.
It isn't about you.


This is all chaos, choose kindness

And p.s. if you have their number from back in the day- maybe check in if they have a manager who deals with their bookings...ya know...respect their boundaries. Don't be a CeCe.